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5 Steps to Proactive Kindness by Jahan Sharif

Photo by, Ghazal Sheei

Photo by, Ghazal Sheei

Hi Friends!

This week, I listened to a podcast where the guest complained about how people weren't "proactively kind" anymore. She went on to say that people rarely did things for the sole purpose of bringing happiness to another person. I thought this observiation was curious, and so I polled a few friends to see what they thought about it. Much to my surprise, many people agreed with her! Since they thought this was a problem and that they'd like for things to be different, I asked them why they didn't make like Ghandi and #BeTheChange?! 

The short answer: They didn't know how. 

I'll admit, my first reaction to this answer was that it was nonsense. But as I had more conversations, I realized that the issue wasn't that people didn't know how to be kind, it was that they didn't know where or how to initiate the process so they could show that kindness, proactively.

And so for this week's Jaja, my official 5-step guide for being proactively kind!

It’s very simple:

  1. Think about one specific person.

  2. Think about one specific experience that has made that person genuinely smile.

  3. Think about what you could do to cause that person to smile.

  4. Do it.

  5. Repeat.

Ex.

  1. Tania.

  2. Surprise invitations to catch up over tea.

  3. Call her and invite her to tea.

  4. Makes call.

  5. Thinks of Tania again, or of another person.

Moral of the story: Think. Act. Repeat

Ain’t nothin’ to it, but to do it!

Los Angeles, California, USA
June 2019

When You Look, What Do You See? by Jahan Sharif

Bluff, Jarvis Boyland, 2019 Oil on Canvas

Bluff, Jarvis Boyland, 2019
Oil on Canvas

While watching the interracial gay couple move through the gallery, taking in the staid portraits of black queer men, I was reminded of the harm that is caused when someone is looked upon, but not seen.

Los Angeles, CA, USA
May 2019

*to learn more about Jarvis Boyland, visit jarvisboyland.com.

Common House, Jarvis Boyland, 2019 Oil on Canvas

Common House, Jarvis Boyland, 2019
Oil on Canvas

Keenan, Jarvis Boyland, 2019 Oil on Canvas

Keenan, Jarvis Boyland, 2019
Oil on Canvas

Expectations, Jarvis, Boyland, 2019 Oil on Canvas

Expectations, Jarvis, Boyland, 2019
Oil on Canvas

D’Angelo, Jarvis Boyland, 2019 Oil on Canvas

D’Angelo, Jarvis Boyland, 2019
Oil on Canvas

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